Thursday, August 12, 2010

adding to the pack

I have tried to resist. I have tried to talk some sense into myself. I have tried to convince myself that we are better off financially and obdigation-wise. I have tried to divert my attention.....But somehow all I have wanted to do since Freckles' death is get another dog.
I realize that the last two years of his life, he was a major head-case that needed not just some deep emotion empathy and redirection, but hard-core antidepressants. His seperation anxiety after the death of Jeff, followed so very quickly by my beloved dog, Eli, was more than his big heart could bear. And although, at times, euthansia seemed the only solution for his window frame destruction/light switch removal/door knob denting/etc., I miss having him around.
I had contacted a woman about purchasing a puppy from her at the beginning of next year. We had chosen a golden retriever whose mother was imported from Germany. It all was so perfect and full of coincidences. The breeder is a younger widow with two children living on a farm. We had decorated a jar with pictures of puppies and started to save for the purchase of the puppy and its' initial vet bills. I was being responsible and logical about the process of adding another member to our family.
But, really, my heart is far from logical. I think probably even moreso since the death of Jeff. When something feels right, I do it. I do it with gusto and just hope that even if my actions yield horrific results, I have learned something in the process thus making the experience valuable.
As I perused the adds on our local used site, I was struck by an add containing a sweet and forlorn-looking german shepherd cross puppy. After speaking to the woman who had him, I felt completely compelled to see him. I told myself, "We don't have to get him. I can just go see him, pet him and be on my way if it doesn't feel right." But, alas, as soon as I set eyes on him, had him in my lap and felt his kisses I was struck.....with puppy love. As I watched how comfortable he was with Briar's loving and at times, overly playful misinstrations, I fell farther. When I watched Liv's face filled with contentment as she stroked the puppy's fur as it calmly laid in her lap, I was head-over-heels.
So two days ago, we headed out to pick up our little guy. He's going to be a big guy as he is german shepherd, husky, leonberger cross.
We've named him Caleb.
So far, he's been fabulous. No chewed up shoes. One accident on the rug. Lots and lots of snuggles and cuddles.
And even if he does do something.....puppy-like, I will remind myself that although Eli was the best dog in the history of mankind, he once ate a pound of butter as a puppy....and barfed it on the floor. And really, he is too small as of yet to detroys curtains, door knobs and other household structures as Freckles did....And he's not fast enough yet to kill a chicken. ;)
I am smitten.


Kate said...


SOOOOOOO precious!!!


My son and I are going to look at kittens today. KITTENS!!! SQUEEEEEEEEEEE

J-in-Wales said...

Rule 1: Never, ever go "just for a look"!!

I wouldn't have been able to resist that face either. He is adorable.

manxlass said...

Enjoy your new family member!

Anonymous said...

So much puppy sweetness. May you have a long and happy life together. :)

Suddenwidow said...

Caleb is beautiful, Jackie! I can see why you fell in love.

Robin Stewart said...

hes pretty cute Jackie, I may even have to come over for a snuggle.

MandyMy said...

Caleb is too freaking cute!! I got a Shepherd after Dan's death, and Samson is the best thing that has ever happened to me. He is a protector, snuggler, and all around Momma's boy. Shepherd's are awesome!! Have fun with your new baby boy!! :)

Jill said...

Of course you couldn't resist.

The picture of Olivia and Caleb just says so much. I am a firm believer that all children need a dog to hug.

indybarb said...

Oh, Jackie, how wonderful for all of you. I have been raising a puppy for the past six months. Her name is "Piper" and she is a future seeing eye if you need to have someone to talk to about puppy stuff it is all pretty fresh in my mind. This black lab puppy has been the biggest handful of a pup I have ever experienced, but I love her so and will miss her too much when I have to return her to "Leader Dogs for the Blind" up in Michigan in January : ( Not sure what I am going to do then without a dog around to fill my life with puppy kisses.

Jenn said...

Aww...He is so cute!! I want another dog too, after two deaths and having to give one away. We're nuts. Can't help it. Today, I asked my 2 1/2 year old if she wanted a little brother or sister and she wrinkled her nose and said, "Nooooo, I want a baby...puppy...ohhhhhh" It was so cute!

German Shepherd said...

Dogs in general are really irresistible especially German Shepherds which are eager, alert, obedient and cheerful according to what I read from I really don't blame for making such drastic decision of taking Caleb home.

sari said...

He's so cute. I'm glad he has found a home with you, you will all love him.

Hallie said...

I am so jealous!!! And so happy for you...furry friends are good for the soul!