Saturday, May 15, 2010

falling into place


Although life has become so stacked full of have tos/should dos/need tos associated with moving, I'm finding that the move and all things associated are falling into place and feel right.
I don't want to mislead you into thinking that life here is placid and calm; it's fucking crazy. But inwardly, I know this is the right decision (although if things blow up in my face, I may be found claiming that it felt wrong from the start....).
There is NEVER a 'free' nanosecond, let alone moment anymore. The second life slows briefly, Briar helps out by emptying the contents of a fire extinguisher in the basement, Liv decides that my refusal to by a fused plastic doll with shocked expression and a smear of some unidentified substance on its' synthetic clothing from the secondhand store is evidence that I don't love her as much as love "Briar or the Earth" (her words, not mine), and ducklings that were not expected to hatch out for four more days make a surprise appearance. (Again the humidity was off for the late part of the hatch causing one of the ducklings to need my now-skilled hands for extrication from his calcium-laden 'womb'...And again, we have a slightly mangled baby on our hands.
THIS time I know to let Nature straighten out toes herself though. NO orthopedic shoes for this little quacker....)
I have been hesitant to mention one of our enormous life changes before now. Liv will be attending public school in the Fall. I truly feel she is ready to face a few new challenges and to be with other kids more of the time. Many of the practises of conveyor belt conventional continue to cause me to hiss and spit but after meeting with the principal at the school she will be attending, I felt comforted with the thought that I can still remain a large part of her learning experience. I feel that not everything in life is perfect but is necessary for some of the lessons we need to learn (Don't I know THAT)....And I must admit that there are times that I need help. Liv is an eager and excited learner. She is so very bright and knows so many things I had never even grasped at her age....And I hate to admit it, because I feel like a failure as a mom and especially a homeschooling, organic eating, poultry shoe making mom....But it is sometimes hard being in the presence of a wonderfully spirited seven year old girl 24/7. I need a rest. This is SO NOT the main reason she will be attending school, but I think a break from eachother will do us good....I just wish it wasn't EVERYday for 6-7 hours. I will miss her terribly.
The house we are moving into is in the process of being renovated. New roof, new windows, doors, flooring, paint, etc. It's on a five acre parcel of land with two houses (one ours, the other the landlord's). The landlord's driveway goes straight down to the beach and we're welcome to go down anytime. They are happily accepting the arrival of our feathered friends and have even agreed to allow us to adopt a dog in the near future!!!!!
I've been offered a job but can't say much about it yet except to say that it will pay well and work with the kid's schedule awesomely.
I have so much more to write but so much more to read in preparation for my class tomorrow.....P.S. Did you know that dandelions are indicator plants and often signal a deficiency in calcium in your soil. BUT because dandelions themselves are SO full of calcium, it's nature's way of curing the problem. Cut 'em off, dig 'em up or mow 'em down, but leave their bodies to put the calcium back into the soil!!! It takes quite awhile to make a difference but is so much better for the enviroment than adding chemical fertilizers as an excess of one nutrient will cause a deficiency in another!!
P.P.S. Can anyone remember what the character's name was in Flashdance? The first picture is of a duckling that looks as if it's wearing legwarmers. I want to name it after the Flashdance girl....

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

Alex was the name of the girl in Flashdance =)
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flashdance

Victoria said...

I'm so happy for you J, honestly no-one could deserve a good dose of good fortune than you. I'm really excited to see and hear more of your changes.

Hawkfeather said...

alex the chicken. hmmm?

One of my kidlits decided last spring that she wanted to attend public school.. we obliged and I have found it- do-able.
some aspects bring me to tears with pride and happiness for how much she delights in her peers and in learning.. and some things make me want to spit nails..

generally the *system*...I am happy my kids seem thus far to have enough empathy to just pity the children who make fun of others- and I have found that when I hear of a child name calling or accosting mine- if we engage in a conversation about *why* that child behaves in this manner.. things tend to slide off their little backs and they walk away proud of their own actions and determined to be kind to someone who is maybe acting out..


but still.. an experience I do not regret.

I find homeschooling hard for sure- I have poor motivation.. but love the options and the space they have as individuals to grow at their own speed-
but some kids thrive at public school..

and sometimes being the crazy weirdo parent is weirdly fun.

-can she walk to school from your new home or will she ride the slybuss-

which is just the word verification- and i thought putting it in a sentence would be fun. HA

I wanna ride the slybuss..

Amber said...

It sounds like you've got a lot of change going on right now. And even better, it sounds like good change. I hope that all of the transitions are as smooth as possible.

And how cute are those ducklings? So. Cute.

Everyday Song said...

Wow. I can't believe you wouldn't just lick that stain on the doll to try and solve the mystery. And, chicken and egg with the dandelions, eh. If you pull apart the stem like string cheese and put them in cups of water, they curl like ringlets. (Our kids will be entertained for hours with this "project" - a fun way to weed the calcium-deprived yard). Good luck with your move. We still can't find half the stuff we packed from ours half a year ago. Cool blog, BTW!

Bonnie said...

Awesome update, all around!

My kids go to public school, and I often wish it didn't have to be so damn long. 6-7 hours three days a week? That sounds more reasonable to me. They need a part-time homeschool, where your kids stay home with you 3 days and the other two days they are in classes with each other.

Alas, as the mama of a bright 8 year old girl, I know it is nice to have a bit of separation.

Best of luck with the new job and the move!

Twig and Toadstool said...

So happy I found your blog...we had a little crippled chick born to us about a month ago...I didn't realize it had to do with humidity...it couldn't get out of it's shell, and was "stuck" to our incubator...so sad...it ended up dying.
I'm a homeschool mom here in Canada...I have a "spirited" nearly seven year old too, who can drive me wild. I think the nice thing about school is that if you find it totally offensive you can always just pull her out. I know here in Ontario, you can do part time school...they just really need the kids in the school to get their numbers and funding up...but, they are totally willing to cater to homeschoolers.
Good luck...it's a hard choice to have to make!
maureen

Mama_Bear_Sarah said...

i'm so excited for you!! the new house and job sound perfect ...sometimes things just fall into place (with a little help from above and our loved ones that have left us that want good things for us).

so................i hear you're going to be shacking up with Andrea and I in San Diego ...YAYA!!!!!!!! can't wait. and yes, i realize you're not sure if you're going or not yet but i thought if I make it sound like it's a done-deal, it will influence you :D

xo
Sarah