Thursday, January 01, 2009

bring on the new year...

Goodbye and good riddance, 2008! You won't be missed, you sour bastard.
I am hoping that 2009 will bring peace, joy and healing back into this house and into the homes of all of you.
You'll have to excuse this 'disconbobulated' post as I seem to have brought in the new year with a wicked ear infection forcing me to ingest large-ish amounts of Tylenol 3's causing my thoughts to run random and amok. My kids are with my sister allowing me some rest and I am hoping that my eardrum will not rupture....although this would be the 15th time that I have experienced this event making it a rather common happening for me.
I have no sage words of wisdom brought on by the pharmaceutical induced boat-like rocking of my brain and the floor. However, I figured as the efficient and philosophical human that I am, I would use the pain-free qualities of the T3's and begin the year with a 'clean slate' so to speak. So I am cooking a batch of 'sugaring' and I am going to remove my leg hair. Yes, I warned you. This post is not of the regular melancholy or crafty sort. It is frivolity and ridiculousness. Even shallowness. The silly ephemeral crap that I regularly bemoan on this blog.
Anyhow, here is a fabulous and effective recipe for sugaring (sugaring is like waxing, but can be washed off with plain water if you get the concoction in the 'wrong' spot or you just lose your nerve).

2 cups sugar
1/4 cup water
1/4 cup lemon juice

I just add the ingredients in a large sauce pan (making it harder to boil over), stir a couple of times and heat to 265 degrees (using a candy thermometer). I remove the pot from the heat and after it has cooled substantially, I pour the molasses like product into a couple of salmon canning jars (I find the wide-mouth of these jars the best for scooping out the sugaring). When it's has cooled enough to apply to the skin, I use a tongue depressor to apply it in a stripe in the direction of the hair growth. I, then, use a strip of precut cotton fabric (I use fabric that has been cut with pinking shears to minimize fraying) to press onto the sugar. I hold the skin taut and swiftly pull the fabric in the OPPOSITE direction of growth (don't pull it 'out' as you'll end up with a bruise - pull it up and back against the skin). Repeat until you're hair-free.
*When doing delicate areas (bikini line and arm pits) apply cornstarch to your skin beforehand as it makes the sugar less likely to adhere to your skin - just the hair.

*You may end up with small raise red bumps after doing this initally as your skin gets used to having its' hair suddenly ripped from its' follicles. It's temporary. Just don't do this the same day you plan to go out in a bathing suit...unless you like red polkadot skin.

Then, just rinse out all your little cloth strips, hang them to dry and use them again next time. As you get into the groove of doing this, you shouldn't have to sugar, shave or wax more often than once a month. You'll have to do it a few times first to get all levels of hair growth first, though.
When you have to do it again, heat your little jar up in a sauce pan of water until it is the consistency of honey and 'fly at 'er'!

It's inexpensive, effective and enviro-friendly! Wee-hoo. I can't say it's totally pain-free, but it's not bad. And you get used to it. I can even do it now while on the phone and no one is the wiser!

*P.S. I think the idea of hair removal is a ridiculous and unfair societal pressure that women should not have to feel the pressure to undertake. It's ludicrous and unnecessary. That said, I am evidently a total hypocrite as I love the feeling of hairless legs and pits.

Happy New Year.

14 comments:

Anonymous said...

weirdo ;-)

Anonymous said...

this is why we love her so......

its a new year.



lilia

Marissa said...

Happy 2009 Jackie. I hope this new year brings you peace.

Ashley said...

Excellent! I'll be giving this a try on the weekend. My ever growing preggo belly will soon not allow me to see properly to shave often so this might do the trick :)

Hope your ear infection takes a hike!

Robin said...

wow I wish I had your recipe before I shaved my legs tonight :)

Annie said...

Cool! I'd love to know how to make my own sugaring product! This may be a surprise to many that know me but I was a licensed aesthetician years ago and struggled with a lot of the chemically products that were more often than not used. Of course there are other things I find ridiculous about that trade. "Trade"? Ha. I'm having a small laugh at myself and my choice of words. I digress. Thanks for posting this! Another thing to try is if you are waxing someone they can help hold the skin taut and then you pull the strip off with one hand and the other hand presses down on the newly hair free skin. It removes any "pain" from the waxed site. Sugaring is definitely less painful that waxing- although waxing done right isn't that painful either.

I would never shave again and I'll admit that I enjoy underarm hair more than being hair free- but I do like to wear a bathing suit without stares or go to a fancy party for my dh's work so I do wax with friend's help from time to time.

I sure hope you start feeling better! I can only imagine how awful your head must feel!

Eilie said...

Sending good vibes to you and your family for a Happy 2009 and beyond.

Thanks for the tip and great instructions. You continue to amaze, impress and inspire me with all the cool stuff you do.

Rock on and Namaste.

Leslie said...

great recipe... although I find it amazing that you can do it on the phone and no one knows.. I'd grunt and squeel like a little girl..haha. Wishing you a less hairier 2009.

Amber said...

Thanks for the recipe. I'll have to see if I can work up the nerve to try this. ;-)

leigh in the sav said...

what an awesome idea! i'll let you know if i ever get brave enough to try it.

here's to 2009!

About Me said...

Gonna try that this weekend. Thanks!

hippymummy said...

When the weather begins to reach temperatures that might encourage e to remove some of the various layers of thermal undergarments that i'm spending the winter hibernating in i might take my courage in both hands and try this method. I wonder if it'll be up to the task that deforesting acres of pale hairy skin requires? Lol!
Hope the nasty ear infection clears up soon too xXX

Crash Course Widow said...

And a happy hairless new year's to you, too! Lol.

You know, I got a NASTY ear infection right after Christmas that first year that Charley died too. Maybe there's a Widow's First Christmas Without custom we didn't know existed but were "gifted" with: a nasty ear infection. ;o) Too bad I didn't get any Tylenol 3s, though. Might have made it more enjoyable. ;o)

Hope the sugaring went well, you lovable hypocrite, you. ;o) And yes, I'm hoping that 2009 will bring you significant doses of all those things you mentioned, too.

Hugs,
Candice

Leslie said...

great recipe and great idea...i just don't know if i would be brave enough to do it to myself.