I can't help but feel angry these days. I am consumed by anger and frustration. I am so bloody mad at Jeff. Why wouldn't he let me take him to the doctor earlier? Why did he leave me like this? I asked him so many times to take care of himself...He has such young children and a wife who is home with them. I am so lonely for him and I am so mad that he's gone!!!!!! I am furious that he left his small children to try to recover after this trauma. I am livid that I must carry all this out alone. What was he thinking? Why did he do this to us?
I know it all is normal to feel this way....but sometimes, I could throw something or scream. It makes it hard to go out when I am so consumed with this rage and I just want to express it....to whomever innocently happens upon my path.
Will it go away? Will I ever feel normal?
The Firehouse Chronicles – Episode 14
5 days ago